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Comparison-itis

Returning to work after having children comes with particular challenges.


When the stakes are high in life and you want to show up as the best version of yourself possible: a certain amount of vulnerability and self-doubt creeps in.


That's part of being human and I don't think there's a person on this planet who has not got worried about their performance at one time or another.


There is one thinking habit though that is toxic to our confidence, luckily it is reversible and with practise it's avoidable too.


That habit of thought is comparing ourselves to others.




It's inherently unfair and nonsensical because every single person and family is unique. So how could they ever be compared to each other?

The human brain is designed to scan for danger and to be wary of anything that is different or unfamiliar. So these hard-wired tendencies almost guarantee that when you compare yourself to someone else then you will find yourself lacking in some way. It's time to reverse and ultimately stop the corrosive habit of camparison-itis.


1. Notice what is happening. "Oh! Check you out! There's a bit of comparing going on here!"

2. Refocus. "This is not helping me feel great. When I feel good about myself I am kinder to myself and I am more the parent and person that I want to be!" 3. Hit Refresh. "I am the best parent I can be in this moment. I am on my own journey, setting my own goals. I am proud of myself for..." 4. Sprinkle some kindness. * Text a friend to say that you love her. * Lavish some praise to a friend on Facebook. * Buy some simple groceries or a treat for your neighbour. * Next time someone wants to chat: give them 10 mins of your time. * Send yourself some love, acceptance and approval.



Lastly, you can ask yourself some ground shifting questions:


* What would my day to day look like if I wasn't comparing myself, my house, my children, my job to anyone else's?


* What do I feel in my body when I accept who I am, just as I am?


* What thoughts or images come to mind when I don't compare myself to another person?


If you would like to explore how comparison-itis is poisoning your outlook on life, you know what to do


* Call me on 0492 918 646,

* Email me at kyliebellcounselling@gmail.com,

** book an appointment


Yours,

Kylie 😊

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